<3 Love. The End. AND…..

I am passionate about Self- Compassion!!!  In fact I almost feel dogmatic about it.  To love and accept myself completely, to be kind and forgiving to myself, to take actions that support my highest good…. relating to myself this way feels like the ‘right’ thing to do, it feels intuitively ‘correct’.  (I put these words in quotes because I’m not convinced that right/wrong exists in any concrete way- the real question being: Does it serve me?) YES it serves me to love myself. I find that well-being, transformation, joy, connection, discovery all flow from a place of self-love.  AND Kristin Neff’s and others’ research shows the incredibly positive results of self-love.  AND ancient teachings speak about the importance of self-compassion.

When I am loving myself I can more fully love my life and others.  The thing is…. self-compassion is not about waiting until I “get it together” to love myself.  (Once I have a better job, I will really love myself/my life. Once I pass this course, I will really love myself.  Once I get my eating habits under control, I will really love myself. Once I know more, I am worthy of being loved by others.) ACTUALLY- when I love myself RIGHT NOW, when I accept and honor myself RIGHT NOW…. I am more able to blossom.

Since I don’t believe that I can ever REALLY know that something is ‘THE WAY’, I’m really curious how self-compassion may NOT be one of the most important truths of all time. Yes, it serves me right now, and seems to serve a lot of people right now, and perhaps is what the human-species needs right now for evolution. Maybe that will change some day…. but then again, I don’t think so (not in this universe anyway)! Because I think LOVE is somehow parallel  to gravity and the forces that hold this universe together! There are forces that hold my body in one mass, hold me to the earth, the earth to the sun, the stars in their place, atoms together.  This force, this pull, this attraction principle… is a foundation of our entire universe. Attraction, pull, forces….. connection…. we’re all connected… when I feel ‘love’ I feel deeply connected to self and others… it all seems related. LOVE SEEMS TO BE THE FOUNDATION OF THE UNIVERSE.

Yes broad sweeping general claims about the universe with no significant evidence/explanation. This is not a carefully planned experiment. These are my rambling thoughts. That FEEL so right!! What the heck am I doing here. How did I end up on this planet, in this body, seeming to have this experience? Love. The end.

Thus, I can turn to love (whose seed is in self-love) as a guide in this human experience.

I often wonder about ‘ultimate truth’.  For a while it seemed most logical/intuitive that I will never REALLY know what’s ‘going on’ here. Now I feel like…. love is going on here. Not that that totally answers all the questions.  But I have this sense of… when I am deeply in the place of ‘love’… then I will be in a place of ‘all-knowing, all understanding.’ There will be no more question. I will just ‘be’ and that will make all the sense. And that when I die… I return to this place.  And I am here now… to play and experience. To take love to the park.

So I really question this feeling of ‘oh okay, I get it’.  Seems dangerous. I certainly don’t totally get how to be in the place of ‘love’ all the time, though I am getting better at it.  But it just seems like I am here to learn how to be in the place of ‘love’ all the time. That’s it, the end.



Here’s Kristin Neff’s website, with wonderful lecture on her self-compassion research, as well as other resources.  I am turning this post into a Self-Compassion Series and will follow up later with the other topics I spoke of in the video.

Wow, having a blog feels messy right now! Am I doing it most effectively? How can I do it better? These thoughts are often swirling, and I move forward anyway! I am trusting that over time it will take a more defined shape. I am excited to be in the experiment of creation, allowing my imperfections. A part of me wants to spend weeks and weeks on each entry, getting it just right, so it makes the most sense. Instead, I am keeping the train moving!  Trusting trusting that it is serving its purpose and will evolve over time.  Its purpose? I LOVE the exploration of the human experience and well-being and want to share my journey with others.  This blog gives shape and form to research that I find personally fulfilling. Why share with others?  Because I feel so passionately about transforming myself and helping others do the same.  If this can help one other person,, in one small way, I am overjoyed.

And now…. Kristin Neff. You go girl. ❤

Kristin Neff. Self-Compassion Research and Resources. Watch: The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self-Compassion. ❤


4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Sheena Pee
    Feb 16, 2014 @ 17:03:30

    Admittedly, I haven’t been reading all your blog posts; but Tamreh, this post resonates with me. Thanks for being a wonderful writer, it doesn’t read as messy to me, but maybe that’s because I think and write in ‘messy’, myself. More importantly, thank you for writing about self-love and compassion, it’s really strange actually, to have come across your post at this particular time because I have been having trouble with the topic. I have had a problem with it for quite some time, a problem implementing self love and tenderness, care, etc. But it’s changing slowly, and your post just soars straight to my heart. Keep on keepin’ on, ma!


  2. Dan
    Feb 16, 2014 @ 18:03:21

    It takes constant commitment and staying true to yourself…..and also introspection to make sure that self-compassion doesn’t take the form of hubris or narcissism, but a genuine caring for both yourself and the world around you.


    • thirstyt
      Feb 16, 2014 @ 19:04:06

      Right! There’s a big difference between narcissism and self compassion. I love how in Kristins video she speaks about this… Comparing self esteem with self compassion.


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